Pets and plants are living things that can provide comfort and companionship in a safer way than being with people. Many trauma survivors talk about their best friends being a dog or cat, or the furthest tree out in the backyard. It is not uncommon to hear how pets have actually lashed out and fought against the perpetrators on behalf of the child/person they loved. Since emotional bonds with people were often broken, interfered with, or just not allowed, many trauma survivors learned to turn elsewhere to meet some of their intimacy needs.

This is an excellent form of coping, and can be encouraged for as long as it is helpful. Having pets or plants depend on you for their survival helps the traumatized person to remember some responsibilities and realities outside of their own personal self care. They teach about daily empathy, relationship, compassion, and comfort. There is much work in the proper caring for pets and plants, but the companionship and devotion seen in response is infinitely valuable.

Pets and plants can give you:

A reason to smile
A friend to play with
A friend to talk to
A deeply devoted emotional connection
Repeated entertainment and pleasure
Ongoing healthy responsibility
Satisfaction as you see them grow and develop
Practice at bonding and caring for something
Something to talk about when you are with other people
A sense of protection

Please assess your realistic ability to tend to, protect, and provide for a pet before bringing one home with you. Remember, these are living creatures too, and they deserve a comfortable, safe home.

If you would like to tell about the cute or meaningful antics of your pet, or describe how your plants and gardening have been important to you, please submit your story to comments@abuseconsultants.com. We would like to post these positive comments as a way to encourage other people.

If pets and plants are intertwined with painful issues for you, please consider a clinical consultation.