Shattered into a thousand pieces-
Scattered, tossed and blown,
My life has been filled with a pain
I should have never even known.

Will I ever find all the pieces?
How do I make them all fit?
I feel like I came in a thousand pieces
in a "build-a-person" kit.

There are times I want to give up --
the pain consuming me gets too hard to bear,
Then I glimpse the "end-of-tunnel" light
and realize I'm almost there.

When all the pieces are snugly in their place,
and my life is finally mine alone,
I want to reach out and help some others,
who feel scattered, tossed, and blown.

By Sheryl of The Phoenix Factor
January 8, 2003
Posted with permission

This was written 13 years ago. We have learned a lot since then. We are NOT totally integrated. There are many within. We learned that to be totally integrated would mean leaving behind the only way of life we have ever known. We learned that we are "WE" for a very good reason. We have learned to function well as a multiple, and appreciate our "insiders" for the helpers that most of them are. We learned we don't have to be "one" to help others who have endured the same horrible traumas we have. We help on a e-mail list that other multiples belong to, and when we are having a rough time, they help us. We learned that with hard work, our sytem could become co-operative and we could be co-concious the majority of the time. We don't know how people with ONE personality do it! We made it work FOR us, and it works fairly well!